男人和女人(英语)

MAN AND WOMAN

 

1) Smart man + smart woman = romance

 

2) Smart man + dumb woman = pregnancy

 

3) Dumb man + smart woman = affair

 

4) Dumb man + dumb woman = marriage

 

5) Smart boss + smart employee = profit

 

6) Smart boss + dumb employee = production

 

7) Dumb boss + smart employee = promotion

 

8) Dumb boss + dumb employee = overtime

 

9) A man will pay $2 for a $1 item he needs.

 

10) A woman will pay $1 for a $2 item that she doesn't need.

 

11) A man never worries about the future until he gets a wife.

 

12) A woman worries about the future until she gets a husband.

 

13) A successful man is one who makes more money that his wife can spend.

 

14) A successful woman is one who can find such a man.

 

15) To be happy with a man, you must understand him a lot and love him a 
little.

 

16) To be happy with woman, you must love her a lot and not try to understand 
her at all.

 

17) Married men lived longer that single man, but married men are a lot 
more willing to die.

 

18) Any married man should forget his mistake, there's no use in two people 
remembering the same thing.

 

19) A woman marries a man expecting he will change, but he doesn't.

 

20) A man marries a woman expecting she won't change, and she does.

 

21) A woman has the last word in any argument. Anything a man says after 
that is the beginning of a new argument.

 

22) Men are like a fine wine. They all start out like grapes. and it's our 
job to stomp on them and keep them in the dark until they mature into something 
with which you'd like to have with dinner.

 

23) Women are like fine wine. They all start out fresh, fruity and intoxicating 
to the mind and then turn full-bodied with age until they go all sour and 
vinegary and give you a headache.