【尼日利亚】加布里埃尔·奥卡拉2022年3月2日星期三 曾经,儿子 他们常常由衷发笑 眼睛也透出率真 而现在他们仅是露齿发笑 冷冰冰的眼神却在我的四周搜寻 曾经 他们的确握手真诚 但那已成为过去,儿子 现在他们握手,心不在焉 右手握着 左手却企图在我的空袋里翻寻 “就像自己家一样!”“再来啊!” 他们说。当我再来时 一次,两次,感觉像自己家一样 但再也没有第三次--- 因我发现他们已经关上大门 所以我学会了许多,儿子 我学会了装扮各种各样的脸 就像适时更换自己的着装--- 家里的脸,办公室的脸,逛街的脸,主人的脸 以及鸡尾酒脸,带着所有适宜的微笑 如同一张带着永恒微笑的照片 我也学会了仅露齿发笑 也学会了敷衍式的握手 还学会了说“再见” 而实际上是庆幸将对方摆脱 学会了说“很高兴见到你” 而实际上是满心不愿 学会了说“很乐意与你交谈” 而实际上是倍感心烦 但相信我,儿子 我想做回曾经的自己,就像现在的你 我想丢弃所有这些虚伪,待人诚恳 尤其是想重新学会怎样发笑 因我在镜中露齿的笑容 就如蛇露出獠牙般的可怖狰狞 所以告诉我,儿子 怎样发笑,怎样显露自己真实的笑容 就如现在的你,我的曾经 后记:此诗语言朴素,风格独特,如父子在壁炉前对话。一个人从童年到成年,学会了圆滑,却丢弃了童真。 原文 by Gabriel Okara Once upon a time, son, they used to laugh with their hearts and laugh with their eyes: but now they only laugh with their teeth, while their ice-block-cold eyes search behind my shadow. There was a time indeed they used to shake hands with their hearts: but that’s gone, son. Now they shake hands without hearts while their left hands search my empty pockets. ‘Feel at home!’ ‘Come again’: they say, and when I come again and feel at home, once, twice, there will be no thrice- for then I find doors shut on me. So I have learned many things, son. I have learned to wear many faces like dresses – homeface, officeface, streetface, hostface, cocktailface, with all their conforming smiles like a fixed portrait smile. And I have learned too to laugh with only my teeth and shake hands without my heart. I have also learned to say,’Goodbye’, when I mean ‘Good-riddance’: to say ‘Glad to meet you’, without being glad; and to say ‘It’s been nice talking to you’, after being bored. But believe me, son. I want to be what I used to be when I was like you. I want to unlearn all these muting things. Most of all, I want to relearn how to laugh, for my laugh in the mirror shows only my teeth like a snake’s bare fangs! So show me, son, how to laugh; show me how I used to laugh and smile once upon a time when I was like you. |